HERE COMES THE BRIDESMAIDS!
David Tutera, star of WETv’ “My Fair Wedding,” tells
you how to treat and care for these precious members of the wedding party
When you select your bridesmaids – whether one or
a dozen – you are choosing people you truly care about, who share a deep connection
with you. And just as your bridesmaids have specific wedding responsibilities, you
my dear bride, have a responsibility to your girls.
♡ Choose Wisely
Now is not the time to make any bridal-party decisions
you may regret. If you are choosing between someone you knew in college and a new
sibling-in-law, remember that a part of your new life as a spouse-to-be is to put
family first – including his. Your friends may not be there forever, but your sister-in-law
will be. So if you are pressured to choose a family member (even if you would rather
not), bend. You will thank me later when she’s not giving you the look over the
Thanksgiving dinner table, still upset that you did not give her the honor of wearing
the lavender dress or ask her to fluff your train. That your first priority is your
new family is something everyone will totally understand.
♡ Be Upfront
Once you’ve decided on your bridal party, ask each
potential ‘maid individually. Ask with kindness and respect. This will set the tone
for the wedding planning to come, and serve as a preview to how the experience will
play out for all of you. Clearly lay out the groundwork as you see it. A bridesmaid
can’t just show up one day and be in the wedding! Have all your information in place,
so there will be no uncomfortable moments as the months unfold. Are you, my bride,
paying for the bridesmaids’ attire? If not, what will your bridesmaids be expected
to lay out for the fabulous dresses you have your eye on? What about hair and makeup
services on the big day? If you’re thinking about a bridal shower and/or bachelorette
party, who in the party will be taking the lead in handling all the details the
details and logistics – and what are the financial expectations?
♡ Be Nice
My grandmother always said, “Treat others the way
you would like to be treated,” – and that is precisely what you, my dear bride,
should be doing for your bridesmaids. Get off to a good start with a fun and festive
dinner or spa get-together. Bridesmaids’ gifts are always appreciated, especially
when they are unique to each girl. Include your ‘maids in planning details, but
let them breathe. Okay, so maybe the tasting you just had wasn’t quite up to snuff,
or the flowers you had your heart set on are out of season. Go ahead and vent to
your bridesmaids for a moment, then move on. They are members of your bridal party,
and while they are a support system, they are not your indentured servants!
♡ Universal Truths
It should go without saying that you should look
for bridesmaids’ dresses that flatter all body types, as opposed to looks more at
home on a runway. Take individual style into account, rather than insisting on a
cookie-cutter approach to hair and makeup come wedding day. Finally, always remember
that your girls are giving up a significant amount of time to be in your bridal
party. So make it count in the best way possible.
David’s rule of thumb: Don’t overburden your ‘maids
with too many tasks. You’ve chosen them because they are special to you, so treat
them with love.
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